This waiting game....

So today I went into my doctors appointment with every intention of letting them know that tomorrow I would be holding my baby girl. Unfortunately, as life so often does this, it didn't completely work out that way. I am still only about 2 cm dilated and my cervix is just really not thinning out. My check ups are almost unbearable. Dr. Croce told me I could induce at anytime, the choice was my own, but she still just wouldn't recommend it. Because the check ups are so painful she informed me that just to have my water broken I would need some anesthesiology (sp)...this really threw me off. I don't want anything more than needed inside my body when it comes to meds. And goodness, if that was going to hurt that bad what would my entire labor end up like.

So after having a moment, worrying about all the people planning on coming in this weekend, crying like a baby, making a bit of a fool of myself while internally battling with my decision, and talking to my husband....I decided that the best thing to do would be to wait. She had suggested inducing Monday, but I told them to just schedule my next appointment for next Wednesday so I have another week for something to happen, and by then I would truly be overdue. Plus if I went into my induction with all of this mental anguish and fear, it was going to be worse than necessary.

I am still praying for a natural labor. I know that God has made our bodies in such a way to handle these things so it's my hope that Lena chooses her own birthday. The idea of induction is seriously only nice because of the fact we live so far away from any of our family. But I have to put that all aside and do what's best for myself and my little girl. I'd hate for something to go wrong just because of my own impatience, or the fact that I having this uncanny way of wanting to please everyone around me!!

So keep us in your thoughts and prayers over the next week. Hopefully she won't get too big that a csection is my only option. Luckily for me I haven't had to suffer from any of the swelling, and to be honest I am not at all miserable. You know how there are those women that are full term and look like they just want to roll over and die?? Yeah not me... I have tons of energy, shoes and wedding rings still fit....my belly has outgrown all of my clothes, but ehh no big deal. The only problem I really have is standing and walking for too long. She is sitting so low that it can amost become painful. So basically I can deal with another week or so of pregnancy....if that's what Lena has in store for me!! :0)